Small Church Pastor and Thank You Notes

In a personal file I have a valuable collection of encouragement notes filled with “thank you” and appreciation, I have collected from over forty years of ministry (I started young). These notes are read from time to time for a jolt of personal joy from remembering the event and the person who wrote the card or note. I have a separate file of notes or letters written by critics or complainers, in comparative size, it is small. I never read them again; because most of them lack the pain, they previously carried.
No doubt about it, the thank you note will be read more than once and still treasured. A thank you note can be written to a volunteer who put together a special occasion. A handwritten thank you note expresses faithfulness, loyalty or hard work.

A THANK YOU NOTE WILL ENCOURAGE A GOOD VOLUNTEER TO BE THE BEST VOLUNTEER

If I enjoy receiving a handwritten thank-you card – it must be true, others enjoy receiving a handwritten thank-you card. If we wrote, more thank you cards and expressed appreciation, we may see a decrease in criticism and complaints. Pastor, we set the atmosphere!

GOD GAVE A GIFT OF 86,400 SECONDS TODAY. HAVE YOU USED ONE TO SAY “THANK YOU?”
–William Arthur Ward

So, let me begin. Thank you, pastor, for reading this brief blog post today. Thank you, for being a man or woman of prayer. Thank you for preaching the Word of God each Sunday. Thank you for your care, love and concern in your pastoral role. Thank you from my heart, for the sacrifices you have made. Thank you, Pastor, for keeping your family first. Thank you, Pastor, for living holy, modest, and revering God. Thank you, Pastor, for your role in the community, your smile and prayers.
Thank you, Pastor, for being a pastor.

Let us get our Thank you note written. Here are some ideas:
1. Thank you for being a friend to the Pastor and Spouse.
2. I know you pray and thank you for keeping your Pastor in your prayers.
3. Thank you for your volunteer work as a Nursery Worker – I know it is not easy giving up a Sunday. Morning Worship Service but YOU are making a difference in the lives of people.
4. Thank you, Youth Leader, I appreciate your leadership and enjoy spending time with you.
5. Thank you, greeters, for your friendly smile, warm welcome and firm handshake every morning, the first 90 seconds a first time visitor comes to our church will cause many of them to return.
6. Thank you, worship team, for practicing often and setting the atmosphere of worship. I could not do it without you.
7. Thank you, (elderly person), for your faithfulness over the past (30) years, I am personally encouraged to keep the faith because of you.

Well, you get the idea; in fact, it may not be a bad idea to write a thank-you card each week or every two weeks. It would do wonders for your spirit and for the spirit of the church. Pray for the person as you write the card, asking God for the spirit of encouragement to envelop them. Thank you cards are inexpensive but are invaluable in encouraging another. Go ahead and write a Thank You card now.

Copyright by Jim Laudell. Materials may not be copied, reproduced or distributed without the written permission of the author. You may share on Facebook, Twitter, and other forms of social media while giving credit to the author. Do not construe this post as medical, legal or professional advice.

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LIFT Living in Fullness Today

The joy continues.

I am so thankful and humbled by the response to my new book, LIFT, Living in Fullness Today, published by Harper Collins Christian Publishing.

Lift is what God does to get people off the ground. Lift is what aerodynamics does to get airplanes off the ground. LIFT is needed in every man and every woman’s life, everyday.

On Launch Day we watched as people posted, “I got mine.” And every new picture and post brought tears to my eyes as I watched my dream come true. I wanted to see people encouraged on a national scale, enough with the blame game, criticism, laughing at others, putting others down and division. People need to be lifted not downgraded. Lifted not scorned. Lifted not shunned.

Launch Day and the day after proved to be amazing. God kept amazing me. On Launch Day, LIFT, went from Amazon’s Best Seller Rating on Spiritual Growth Books #16,698 at 8:30 am to #365 by 9:00 pm. And, Kindle downloads, the day after on Amazon’s Best Seller Rating #55 in Christian Prayer and #283 in Christian Spiritual Growth.

I asked several people, including my congregation, to believe in prayer, specifically on Launch Day, that God would be glorified as the CEO of LIFT. It wasn’t the money because writers don’t get rich but it was a message needed among thousands.

Thank you! To the many people who bought the book, thank you! For the many people who posted their picture with “I got mine,” thank you!  For the many pastors who ordered multiple copies for their staff, thank you! For the many people who prayed and believed with us, thank you!

If you haven’t ordered LIFT here is a link for both paperback and Kindle download. Blessings to you.

The Small Church Pastor and the Holidays

One thing is for sure about Christmas – it comes around every year. There are times Christmas holidays can play havoc on the calendar. A dinner, family gatherings, local events, church programs, shopping, cooking, giving presents and much, much more. But there may be some common sense ways to enjoy the holidays without ending up in the ER from “December overload.”

Keep Your Calendar Handy. There is not a doubt the holidays are hectic, so make it easier on yourself by comparing your calendar with your wife’s calendar. Our department leaders meet the week before Thanksgiving and synchronize our church calendars. Most times and dates are set a month ago but with school events, local events and family schedules, but there may be some late changes to the December calendar. The Key Word is Flexible.

Change Your Morning Routine. This may not work for everyone but personally, I like getting in the office by 5:00 or at the latest, 6:00 in the morning to write, pray, to read my Bible and to take a peek at my calendar for the day. My home is close, so I slip back to the house about 9:00, for breakfast and a cup of coffee with my wife. This is our “talk time,” which is important as family events seem to “pop up” quickly, especially since three of our grandchildren celebrate birthdays during the month of December. The Key Word is Communicate

Enjoy the Moment. A small church Pastor must plan personal time by selecting a day that seems to be a light schedule to take a moment to enjoy the Christmas lights, have a date night with your wife, or a short break at your favorite coffee shop. Grab a book to read for thirty minutes, spend more time at the gym or call an old friend to wish him, Merry Christmas, are some other ideas. Hug your grandkids, tell stories and make memories, and enjoy the moment. The Key Word is Relax.

Endeavor to be Spiritually Sensitive. As a small church Pastor, I am painfully aware of the busyness of the season but there are numerous people who suffer from anxiety issues, depression, frustrations, family issues, sickness, and financial stress during the holidays. Jesus is the Reason for the Season and we must be spiritually sensitive to families who are hurting and the elderly who are lonely, the list goes on. The small church Pastor may be needed more during the holidays than at any other time of the year, plan your sermons to bring encouragement and healing to the hurting and hopeless. We are not called to simply pray for people but pray with people. Care, concern, and comfort are necessary during the holiday season. Let God use you as you go about the community and lead people to lean upon the arms of Jesus. The Key Word is Prayerful.

God bless ALL our small church pastors – all of heaven is behind you!
Copyright by Jim Laudell. Materials may not be copied, reproduced or distributed without the written permission of the author. You may share on Facebook, Twitter, and other forms of social media while giving credit to the author. This post should not be construed as medical, legal or professional advice.

The Small Church Pastor and Tomorrow

Several months ago I gathered every young adult in our rural church and asked them one question, “What will this church look like in seven years?” “In seven years your  children will be teenagers and 10% – 20% of the church will pass away or move away.” We were reminded by reports, “10% of United States churches will close.”

 

Tomorrow increasingly became important to us.

 

One middle-aged woman commented, “We shouldn’t concern ourselves about the future, God will take care of that, we must take care of today.” The statement bothered me, God does take care of today and tomorrow, however, scripture cautions and duty demands us to prepare for tomorrow.
With the input of our young adults, we developed a seven-year plan for teaching, reaching and growing in our rural church. When Joshua crossed over the Jordan River, God commanded, place 12 stones on the inside the Jordan and the outside of the Jordan, as a testimony to future generations. (Joshua 4:6-7). We intended, by the grace of God to create a testimony for future generations.

 

We taught our young adults, leadership principles, such as communication, relationships, determination, and giving. Our young adults set up and clean up in the fellowship hall for various gatherings, they served Thanksgiving meals to the homeless and poor, they volunteered for open positions and gave to several projects. IF YOU DON’T TEACH IT – THEY WON’T REACH IT
We planned a Dave Ramsey Financial Peace University program in a large room of the local civic center inviting other young adults to come. The results would be twofold, we would gain information about finances and meet other young adults struggling with the same issues, for the purpose of introducing them to Jesus Christ and to invite them to our church. IF YOU DON’T GET OUT OF THE BOX–THOSE WHO LIVE OUT OF THE BOX WON’T RESPOND.
We created a young adult dinner for fellowship and brainstorming on vision, purpose and planning our outreach calendar, (we desired a regional church instead of a rural church). We became partners with the local school and created ministries to area children. Our Bible Quiz teams grew, almost doubled, when we invited the community to take part. (We chose Bible Quiz to develop a discipleship for future generations). IF YOU ARE NOT EXTERNALLY FOCUSED YOU WILL BE INTERNALLY FOCUSED.
We became more interwoven, instead of compartmentalized. Our children’s groups incorporated the elderly, our young adults and elderly served together, side by side, in various outreaches, fellowships, and ministries. Just like Nehemiah did when they rebuilt the wall, “I even set the people after their families.” (Nehemiah 4:13). IF YOU ARE NOT INTERWOVEN YOU WILL BECOME COMPARTMENTALIZED.

Prayer groups began prayer before every morning service, asking for God’s help and for the Holy Spirit to move in our church and in our community. Even though the group has been small at times, it definitely is one of the most important things we do on a weekly basis.  IF YOU DON’T PRAY ABOUT IT – IT WON’T HAPPEN.
A disclaimer may be necessary:  this took months – not weeks and two families left because the church was changing. Yes, it was, no longer intrinsic but extrinsic. Our missions, benevolence and outreach finances grew, our community outreach to schools, the needy, and the poor expanded. Instead of people asking, “What is the church doing for me?” A good majority of the congregation asked, “What am I doing for God?” This is difficult, not magical and not “bought in” by everyone but it’s part of the seven-year projection. The wins have been substantial and we have just started. It is still a work in progress and may not work for everyone but we are still trying to influence this region for God.

 
Copyright by Jim Laudell. Materials may not be copied, reproduced or distributed without the written permission of the author. You may share on Facebook, Twitter, and other forms of social media while giving credit to the author. This post should not be construed as medical, legal or professional advice.

The Small Church Pastor and Outreach

When it comes to outreach, it tends to be a no-brainer for the small church pastor. We know we should; we want to and we see the needs. Reaching out to the community includes two directions. Event Outreach or Relation Outreach. Event Outreach tends to “make a splash,” with a gospel singing, a fun-filled children’s day or a partnership with a public school. Often, the expense and the work involved make these events “once or twice a year.”
The other, Relation Outreach, is on a personal level. Giving groceries to a needy family, supplying needy items to a family whose home has burned, or carrying a snack bag into the ICU waiting room for wearied family members. Some churches have provided a Thanksgiving meal to a needy family or supplied Christmas gifts to a poverty-stricken family.

 
Both outreaches are what I call, “seed planting.” There may not be quick results but the influence is long lasting. Every small church wants to create, what I call, “positive gossip.” When you reach out to families with events or assisting families you are “seed planting,” and creating “positive gossip,” and as weeks roll by, families remember the generosity and kindness of the rural church. Your goal is NOT Sunday attendance but to build long-lasting relationships.

 
How can the small church serve our community?

 
DETERMINE THE NEED. While still in my twenties, a well-known pastor of a growing church, Tommy Barnett, made this statement, “Find a need and fill it.” This is a strong motivation for finding the most efficient means of reaching our rural areas and community. Some churches have a food pantry open one day a week, others give away coats during the cold seasons, and some churches supply single mothers with Christmas presents. One great outreach in the community has been the “Mother’s Day Out.” Where the church provides child care and provides financial assistance for the “single mom,” to a nail salon, beauty shop and maybe, even get her a massage and some shopping gift cards. This is a relation based outreach and likewise, meets a need.

 
DETERMINE THE COST. Cost efficiency is necessary for the small church. First, express the vision. Explain in detail the need for the next outreach. Secondly, spell out the cost for each stage. The overall cost may seem overwhelming but breaking up the cost in bite-sized pieces recognizes even the smallest gifts. Thirdly, explain “why.” Why would we want to help a single mom? Why would we want to provide Christmas to a struggling family? Even Scrooge will participate in an offering to help a family in desperate need. Fourthly, start early. Catching people off guard will often give an undesirable response. Start advertising and collecting funds beforehand.

 
DETERMINE THE NUMBER OF VOLUNTEERS NEEDED. The most common complaint among small church pastors has been, “We don’t have enough volunteers to do an outreach, but much is determined by “how we said it” rather than “what we said.”

 

Don’t say this, “We need several volunteers for our Christmas outreach this year.”
Say this, “God has given us an incredible opportunity to change a single mother’s life. We only need two women to volunteer to purchase the needed items. And, we need two volunteers (maybe, teenagers) to volunteer to watch her children on a Thursday night from 6:00 to 9:00.”
Don’t say, “We are taking an offering for the needy in our community.”
Say this, “We will be receiving an offering through the next two weeks for a single mother in our community who is in need of assistance for herself and her two children.”
Don’t say, “We are collecting gifts for needy children.”
Say, “We are collecting $150 for a bicycle and a doll and baby carriage for a boy and a girl depending on us for their Christmas this year.”
You may have a better way to express the need to your congregation but when you detail the need, explain why and put dollar signs on the need, the people will open up their heart and their wallet.

 

PEOPLE WHO WON’T GIVE GENERALLY WILL OFTEN GIVE SPECIFICALLY

 

DETERMINE TO PRAY ABOUT IT. Mention the need often, making it a matter of prayer. It concerns God about the needs of people in our community, involve God in the outreach process. Prayer is a change maker. Prayer makes a difference. Charge the church to become involved in praying for the needs throughout the community. Make this a yearlong prayer request, post needs. While the church may not be able to meet every need–the church can effectively and efficiently meet the needs of some.

Copyright by Jim Laudell. Materials may not be copied, reproduced or distributed without the written permission of the author. You may share on Facebook, Twitter, and other forms of social media while giving credit to the author. This post should not be construed as medical, legal or professional advice.

The Small Church Pastor and Church Attendance

Several pastors this week were admitting failing to maintain steady church attendance. Each one had experienced low attendance over the last few months and were concerned.

“What is wrong with my people, they use every excuse they can find to miss church?”
“We had a great outreach on Saturday but had our lowest attendance on Sunday.”
“Do people even care about faithfulness anymore?”
“We need our musicians, singers, and greeters to be at their post but they continue to miss and don’t even let me know they will be absent – what am I doing wrong?”             “When you pastor a church of less than 100 every person counts.”

Even though pastors have taught on faithfulness, pastors are struggling with a variety of lame excuses. From “the cat had kittens” to “my nose was running.” One person just “needed a day of rest,” after spending the day at a Fall Festival. “It’s like the church is at the bottom of the list,” a Pastor moaned. One light-hearted pastor quipped, “Well, at least this church is going down slower than the last one I pastored.”

But doesn’t attendance, faithfulness and spiritual growth matter? Yes, it does but let’s look at some of the problems with church attendance.

1. THE CHURCH IS LOSING MEMBERS – I started with the worst scenario. When members of your church are leaving disgruntled this is devastating to a Pastor who has been trying to do his best but couldn’t heal the rift. Prayer and fasting are mandated in such moments and a week in a secluded location can sharpen your leadership abilities in this time of crises. Show the remaining congregation strength and security by reassuring your followers and by being honest and hopeful.

2. THE ATTENDANCE IS LOW – There will be seasons of highs and lows brought about by vacations, health reasons, and holidays plus, in rural areas, harvest time. Pray and stay encouraged. Keep in touch with your absentees. No matter where you pastor or who you pastor, there will be absenteeism.

3. UNFAITHFULNESS – There will always be certain somebodies who treat church attendance as a guest instead of a member. Absenteeism is in every church and the unfaithful have the lamest excuses. Not surprising, many Baby Boomers interpret faithfulness as Sunday Morning attendance on every other Sunday. To add to the problem, unfaithfulness hurts the church finances because the unfaithful members rarely catch up on their tithe giving.

4. PLANNED ACTIVITIES – Many events are being planned on Sundays from Family Reunions, Birthday Parties, and Concerts and even, shopping. With the church being live streamed, multiple services throughout the week and online Bible Studies, it has become much easier to stay at home. Reading a devotional has been equated with listening to the Pastor preach the Word of God. Maybe the church needs fewer activities but more mission mandated activities.

5. THE ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM – Attendance is not the measuring stick of the Pastor’s success level. Many pastors are great men of God but lack a support system around them. Yes, spiritual growth and church health are anemic when faithfulness to the House of God is not taught but a pastor shouldn’t beat himself up because people have lost their desire. Preach the Word, stay in love with Jesus and continue to love people.

What can we do about it? Sometimes, nothing. If we preach about it – we are scolding. If we teach on it – we are critical. And, if we ask where they were, get ready to hear excuses from A to Z. So what is a Pastor to do?

• Realize absenteeism will happen. If it isn’t a habit – don’t make it a bigger problem. Things come up and people will miss for credible reasons.
• Don’t be too harsh but express heartfelt concern when you haven’t seen a member regularly.
• Pray for each of them and send a card or text every time they miss. Let them know you miss them.
• Be willing to change service times or days if you need to make it more plausible. We changed our Wednesday night service from 7:00 to 6:00 and served dinner for those rushing in from work.
• Quit saying, “Where two or three are gathered there am I in the midst of them,” every time you have a low crowd. Don’t excuse unfaithfulness. Preach your best message and worship God. Keep focused on Jesus and not on people who are missing.

Copyright by Jim Laudell. Materials may not be copied, reproduced or distributed without the written permission of the author. You may share on Facebook, Twitter, and other forms of social media while giving credit to the author. This post should not be construed as medical, legal or professional advice.

THESE GIFTS ARE NOT INTENDED TO BE USED IN THE CHURCH 2018 Favorite Post

God has intentionally and appropriately gifted people in the church to fulfill the mission and vision of the church. Some are God gifted people who are able and willing to, with their team, to accomplish the work God has set before them. They are a joy to the leader and are a resource to the church.

However, there are some who are self-gifted. Maybe sensing the need to do something they clamor for a position, desire acclamation and perform for applause. The gift is questionable to the leadership and may reach the level of obnoxiousness to the congregation. Some self-gifted volunteers can be redirected into a more purposeful and God-honoring area of ministry while others simply fade away to “use their gifts elsewhere.”

GOD GIVEN GIFTS exemplify the fruit of the Spirit, love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance.
SELF GIVEN GIFTS react instead of restore, resign instead of revive and resist instead of respect.

There are gifts NOT intended to be used in the church, in any church.

THE GIFT OF ASSUMPTION
Nothing is more disturbing to the leadership of the church than a person who assumes the worst and ignores the best. The negative attitude is carried through the sanctuary like a carton of rotten eggs. They presume and assume about everything and everybody. No, this gift is not based on evidence and certainly not based on facts but purely on speculation. No gift of discernment is evident just entire and complete fabrication based on “I thought I saw…”

THE GIFT OF INTERRUPTION
The “know it all” has an opinion on everything and everybody. They are often wrong but never admit it. They don’t mind telling you “how I feel about it.” Explanation, examination or exegesis is not a part of the conversation; interpretation is based on an interior motive of being right and winning the argument or the debate. Combustible when losing and celebrates others loses.

THE GIFT OF MAGNIFICATION
Making a “mountain out of a molehill” is the ulterior delight of the “magnifier.” Small is enlarged in their mind before all the facts are known. Taking bits and pieces they construct a castle of doubt and fear. Pastors are trying to deal with problems but the “magnifier” increasingly casts suspicion on the people involved. Making others feel smaller and themselves bigger is the role of the “magnifier.” The personal quest to build their own statue of holiness perceives everyone else as the enemy who is guilty until proven innocence.

THE GIFT OF MANIPULATION
Moving people like games pieces on a checkerboard is the goal of the “manipulator.” A buried desire to “straighten” other church members out is the outcome of most discussions. The motto of the “manipulator” is “do what I say don’t do what I do.” They have a hidden, interior design to have other’s follow their lead without question. Some will come back to the discussion table with manipulative statements, “You can’t make it without my tithes.”

THE GIFT OF AGITATION
The agitator has been hurt and they fling hurt wherever they go. “Hurt people hurt people,” and the agitator lives up to it. “Locked and loaded” is emblazoned across their forehead. Harm and hurt are left in the path of destruction. Stirring up trouble, living on demeaning actions and an incendiary attitude describes the agitator.

• Pray sincerely and humbly for direction. God has answers we haven’t seen.

• Slowly approach others who have witnessed this behavior. Others may be willing to agree and others may simply say, “That’s just the way he is.”

• Check their history – has it been an ongoing problem or something out of the clear blue? It may be pressure in his home or workplace or a serious health issue.

• Weigh it carefully before acting. Removing people from leadership is harder than placing people in leadership. And, having people leave your church is easier than gaining people into your church.

• Examine your own heart whether you are acting or reacting, shepherding or fighting; then proceed with the passion of Jesus.

Copyright by Jim Laudell. Materials may not be copied, reproduced or distributed without the written permission of the author. You may share on Facebook, Twitter, and other forms of social media while giving credit to the author. This post should not be construed as medical, legal or professional advice.

THE SMALL CHURCH PASTOR AND HIS STRUGGLE

Every Pastor, whether the church is large or small, struggles to some extent with the pressures of performance. Whether we like it or not our attendance and our offerings growl like an angry Doberman at our conscience biting at our credibility, our character and our capability.

Our credibility will be questioned, “Where’s all the money going?”
Our character, “We need to pray more.”
Our capability, “We used to run more people.”

The small church pastor doubles as janitor, care taker, maintenance worker, and often, bi-vocational. His schedule his full, he feels he doesn’t have enough money or enough time to spend time with his family. Several Pastors, personally confessed of feeling incompetent and discouraged.
Without seeming redundant or condescending, there is, and should be, a relief valve. What we need is more than a day off, a coffee break or a vacation but we do need to see what God sees. To capture the heights of His understanding and to gain His approval. Without sounding simplistic, God’s evaluation of my ministry in incredibly important.
Here are three insights to reveal “Does God understand my struggle?”
THERE ARE SEASONS. 1 Corinthians 3:6 I have planted, Apollos watered; but God gave the increase. Not only are there different seasons but there are different ministries. God may have you at your location to plow the field, the next pastor may sow the seed and the next pastor may yield the harvest. Or, one pastor may experience all three seasons – wait for it.
1 Corinthains 3:8 Now he that planteth and he that watereth are one: and every man shall receive his own reward according to his own labour. Don’t despair in the season of cold, when plowing is tedious and tiresome; plow in anticipation of the harvest.
Take Away: Understanding the rise and fall of attendance and offerings are usually seasonal. Summer slump and Christmas holidays can be devastating to a small church but early Spring and Fall usually provide an upswing. Plan your greatest events during the months you typically see your increase.

THERE ARE GOD MOMENTS Isaiah 43:18-19 Remember ye not the former things, neither consider the things of old. Behold, I will do a new thing; now it shall spring forth; shall ye not know it? I will even make a way in the wilderness, and rivers in the desert. A “God Moment” is an unbelievable intervention causes you to celebrate, “It couldn’t have happened unless God did it.” Call it a breakthrough or revival or a windfall but it was absolutely a moment in your ministry when no one or nothing but God could have brought the results you received.
Take Away: Continual and tenacious prayer proceed breakthroughs. Step into the secret closet of prayer. Talk to God about the lows of your ministry. Ask Him to give you strength to go through the nonproductive days. Be willing to wait for God’s intervention.

THERE ARE LOVE LESSONS For me, a love lesson, is when it strikes me with the truth, God loves me and accepts me. In my failures, my lack of performance, and in my insufficiencies, He continues to accept me. There are times of tears and times of celebration, high and lows, success and failure but in each there is God’s love for me. Comparison to others will never solve the ache in my heart for approval. Approval only comes from God. Allowing God to express His love, even, without success, in monumental. You may feel all alone but in those quiet nights of reflection God whispers, “I love you.” Give your ministry to Him and He will see you through.
Take Away: Comparison with other ministries will get you down. Look to Jesus for the church He has entrusted you with. Allow God to reveal the vision He has for your congregation. Understand God’s approval of you is not based on your performance or success.

Copyright by Jim Laudell. Materials may not be copied, reproduced or distributed without the written permission of the author. You may share on Facebook, Twitter, and other forms of social media while giving credit to the author. This post should not be construed as medical, legal or professional advice.

 

 

The Small Church Pastor and His Wife

A small church Pastor is most likely bi-vocational. That means he has two jobs – neither of which pays him enough to do without the other.
A small church Pastor likely feels time crunched with two jobs, ministry duties, visitation, sermon preparation, board meetings, church maintenance, denominational meetings, parsonage repairs, and personal devotion and prayer.
A small church Pastor is most likely financially strained as he leads the church in giving, expected to give to every child who is selling a candy bar at school and pays his denominational dues.
However, if all the above fall short there is one thing and one thing alone that rises to the top of the “you must do this one thing” scale. If you ever leave the church, this will be the one item you will take with you. Your wife is the most essential part of your ministry. Your wife is the one prized possession a small church pastor has above all else.
YOUR WIFE IS A GIFT FROM HEAVEN. Proverbs 18:22 Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD. Respect and honor to your wife in public and in private will “obtain favor from the Lord.”
YOUR WIFE IS HALF YOUR MINISTRY. Eccleisates 9:9 Live joyfully with the wife whom thou lovest all the days of the life of thy vanity, which he hath given thee under the sun, all the days of thy vanity: for that is thy portion in this life, and in thy labour which thou takest under the sun. Many of the ministry duties and responsibilities are directed by your wife.
YOUR WIFE NEEDS YOU. She needs your time, she needs your ear and she needs your heart. Don’t be afraid to give her all three. Take the time, prime time, when it just the two of you, and invest in your relationship. I personally believe, a strong pastoral marriage helps build strong marriages in the church.
YOUR WIFE NEEDS YOUR PRAYERS. Pray for your wife daily. Pray for her physically, mentally and spiritually. She may take a phone call she didn’t need to answer. The snarky looks and penetrating stares are overwhelming. Keep praying for her and keep praying together.
YOUR WIFE NEEDS YOUR LOVE. Tell your wife you love her. Look her in the eye and let her know she still means the world to you. Remember why you married her and repeat it to her. Go on a date, it doesn’t have to be expensive but it does need to be personal and private. Invest in your marriage before you invest in the church.

Copyright by Jim Laudell. Materials may not be copied, reproduced or distributed without the written permission of the author. You may share on Facebook, Twitter, and other forms of social media while giving credit to the author. This post should not be construed as medical, legal or professional advice.